Ok man

I had such great ideas about what to write just a little while ago... and then I ran into a Facebook snag... A couple of quality chats none the less. And then just before coming here to do that thing I do for some reason, I went to the old Craigslist site and looked under events... I like to see what kind of events are posted being a man who has events and feels some basic promoter urges to get the word out. It can be a real complicated loop if you let it be... the key for me is to know why I am doing something and what I want out of it, and fortunately for me, what I want out of it seems to be the raw fact of doing it.

Anyhoo, one of the events posted was the opportunity to learn about the "Music Business" at Douglas Collage in a course. This course was offered years ago and I remember waffling with Roger Dean Young over whether we should take it or not. I decided to take it in some retarded wave of "I need to know this if I want to do this properly" mind sequence. So I signed up, paid with credit card and marked my first day of class on the calendar. Shortly before that day I suffered and incredible back injury... I was in agony and sitting was the worst thing... going to class would be not recommended , but when I sign up do do something I damn well do it (a trait my parents instilled in me).

I remember being on the Skytrain with my notebook and my spine in agony with every slight movement of the train... How could I survive this day? It was important... I make records and put them out for business.. I should know that business.

I got off and walked up the hill to the "college" and found my assigned classroom... It was empty. There was a math class going on across the hall but my class was empty... How could this be? Hey I'm a nice guy I'll just wait for a while... after half an hour i went down to the "Info booth" and their records showed just like mine that yes a class should be going on in that room right now... but it wasn't... I even went back up.

And then I went home... In a way mostly happy that I didn't have to spent the day in a chair.

A week later just before the second class I got a phone call telling me the class has been canceled due to lack of interest... I mentioned that I was aware of this fact already and that the call was a week late... there was indifference on the other end of the line.

So I did learn a lot: When you are trying to make it in the music business nobody gives a rat's ass about you... you are in a classified group of consumers who can be parted with your money with the hope that one can help you succeed... and if there aren't enough of you to fill the coffers on any given venture then fuck off until next time.

That's the raw truth of the music business... if anything has ruined music it's business, and we all know that's true. So if you are going to go to a class to teach you how to change to fall in line with a system... I say, you might be better off going to the casino because in the casino they will always welcome you.

It was shortly after my brush with Douglas College that I considered quitting music all together, and I was very serious about that... But the fact was that I wasn't thinking right. I was thinking about the music business and what a cold self serving, "you want this opportunity pay me" horse shit vibe that i was sick of.

So I had to ask myself "why do i play music?", because it's fun and I feel good doing it and I like a lot of the songs that I come up with. So why not do that, and embrace that, and grow that... I went to a club and pitched a show I wanted to do, the club agreed and I showed up every week for the last 6 years and am still figuring out what it is I mean to do... People come and people go, and in the end it's all just memories.

Last week I got to play with Lewis Melville by following my heart:

Bloggerson strikes again

But the only Question is Why?

I think at the heart of the issue the answer lies somewhere around the idea that it is just a fact that Bloggerson is doing it, so then carry on... but then again, along the same vein, if one could come up with some great philosophical answer to why one does anything then answering that question could be worthwhile.

I have a feeling that answers to questions like that are solved by answering other questions and then the logic is strung together to make sense only to be then reduced again to something more portable and poetic. Remember poetry is a Jackass sport... feel free to remember to put that on my tombstone or Urn for that matter.

What do i mean?

Poetry is great in the hands of a true poet but there are a million jackasses out there for every poet who believe stringing flowery language together ad nausium is poetry and they are always trying to share it with you at your own peril. Often these fools would like to discuss it further, and they are such sensitive fuckers that you can't even call them on their "horse shit" without spending even more energy putting out the fire that be ignited by that truth.

Moustache- OK i raised $41 so far for cancer by being part of a "Movember team"... I consider it a deep insult to my character to be on a team of people growing moustaches and most of the eager for the month to end so they can go back to their safe clean shaven mode. One guy on our team looks killer... nice moustache, soul patch... but it's driving him crazy... hopefully he will come around and keep the stache into the new year.

What is really weird is how the other wives get involved in this whole decision... My wife and I, we are in a different universe. I guess it was pretty clear from the get go that by getting together with me you would be in for a life of pro sideburns, moustaches and full beards that will come at you randomly and consistently. Perhaps these fellows didn't lay the proper groundwork before they got married and now all the calls that a man should make are being dialed up by a woman.

Imagine if i married an anti moustache soul releasing poet?

I'll take CT any day... she is a crazy Kook, but she is my kind of kook. Comes up big on the things that matter and then crashes into home plate with a smile on her face. I have a feeling she threw out some of my good stuff last month, but in the end I don't think I'll miss it and our house has a little less clutter to it which is actually uplifting. I Loath to admit that... in the event that she will read this... which I'm sure she will at some point in time... and then get a head of steam and feel all confident to throw out more stuff. I do have plans for all of that stuff... it's just that I'm kind of overwhelmed right now... not that i should be... i waste many hours every day on needless horse shit... i need focus... i am a failure.

But this was Bloggerson strikes again and in a short time i have reduced myself to a failure... nonsense! That equivalent to dissing a good moustache... no worries i just punched myself in the face... kind of wish i didn't hit my eyeball with my knuckle in retrospect... my vision has yet to come back in that eye... but it looks like it is coming back... sharp pain in the back of the eye... but lets face it, I had it coming.

In the Can- So i recorded the latest 21 Tandem Repeats "album" a few weeks ago and i am set to go mix it very soon. I really feel great about this one... and i think if you know me you know that those words don't often. I think the big thing here is that i had the confidence to make the music i wanted to make and knew how to go about doing it. I think on this topic everybody has their own method and there is never any one right way, because of course "art is a line and it follows a spine and you know when you know when it works". That's why art is beautiful, because there is a method behind it and you follow that and then you enter completion and the real trick is not to get stuck on some minor decision and think it really matters. It does matter of course, but you take care of that by making sure you have written your songs properly, and by making sure you can play them expertly, and then in my case by making sure the people playing with you are excellent and aren't sure what is about to hit them, and that those said people are Gun ho on that fact. I have always known this... I remember being in a jam in Northern Ontario at a tree planting camp and i led a jam on a tune that i made up on the spot and everybody had a grand time, and after the fact one of the guys, who was a good guitar player pointed out my gift... the gift was to carry the spirit of the song so that others could play along... here we were in a hotel in Manatuage Ontario In 1993 and now in the winter of 2010 i put it together... mind you i needed to learn a lot of lessons and accumulate a lot of skills and test these over time. I feel great on this one.. perhaps it's the fact that there is a lot of grand piano played by C.S. Rippin on it, or perhaps it's the fact that Alvaro Rojas delivered the masterpiece on "Famous person", or perhaps it's the fact that JLS pulled some baseline from out of nowhere to make the song "Nothing was heard", or maybe it's the fact that Shawn Killaly is just an incredible drummer. I think for me, mostly it was the fact that the bet payed off... I spent more money than i actually have, but i realized what i needed to, which on my end is better than spending less than i have and ending up in some democratic decision making process that one finds them self in when they are in an official "band". Don't get me wrong, i love all the people i have ever played with and made records with and i stand behind everything i have ever released... with the exception of the "Chicken EP".

Whats wrong with the Chicken EP? I'll give you an example of the decision making process. There is a song "East" which is a pretty cool number... so a few band members go out on the town to record some wind chimes and they find some wind chimes in some ladies backyard so they record the wind chimes and while they are recording the lady comes out of the house and confronts them for being in the backyard and one of the guys recording the wind chimes comes up with some smart assed response to her concerns and then there is laughter... it was funny for the record, but it went on for like half a minute. So the question became should that sample be before the track? democratic vote that was split so the compromise was to put the sample at low volume which meant the listener of the CD heard 30 seconds of basic silence before the song started... i tried to point that out at the time but as we know democracies are useless... there are good ideas and bad ideas... everything on that release was that way... for a collection of songs that had potential boy did we ever work against each other... my vocals were brutal and that was helped by the same forces, but the point is that's not how you do it.

To do it right you need to learn how to do it wrong.

You have to be bad to be good.

One tip on how to grow a Moustache

Of course it is Movember, and I was asked to join a Movember team with some of the local fathers. Now it's not like I need any facial hair prompting so sure I'm in.... why not. Besides i kind of need to start a Moustache to look like my passport photo for that trip we are taking in the winter.

Well it has come to my attention that I am dealing with a pack of facial hair rookies, and even worse they are reveling in their rookie state. It's a damn shame and a disgrace to professional facial hair as a whole, but it's for a good cause, and it raises awareness about prostate cancer (will it get all the guys into a doctor to get the rubber finger through the rectal hole for a feel to see if anything is enlarged?) You know you have to do that right?

So the most obvious mistake is the fool who shaves every day to leave a tiny moustache on their face to be ridiculed, and laughed about at work, by family members and "friends"... a test of your manhood right... good for conversation and awareness and perhaps the embarrassment becomes a better fundraiser, but it's all wrong.

Grow a beard... if you haven't done that ever in your life i don't know what to say... really I can't comprehend.

Why?
1) Because you need to know how your facial hair grows in.
2) That will let you know what will look best on your face
3) You will need to carve the moustache from some real growth to be able to see it for what it wants to be.
4) Not only that but if you trim it every day you become suspect to the "over trim", especially as a rookie... a little mistake on one side and then you have to even it up next thing you know you have the Adolf Hitler Moustache... and that's a real hard one to wear.

Other notes include the fact that you spend the first few weeks walking around with a chump moustache, and that becomes the focus of ridicule... you can't raise a proper moustache under those circumstances... like a child, a moustache needs love, and it needs to be worn with dignity. You have to start dressing to the moustache, walk a little taller, speak a little firmer. As a matter of fact if you get a good moustache it's best in social situations to only talk about things you really know... you start flapping your gums talking some B.S. then you are prone to embarrassing your moustache.

I know of a fellow who can really rock a moustache with great dignity and he has a name for his moustache. I always accepted that as a good idea but now that I'm writing this i can see it clearly.. it is about respecting the moustache and so you give it a name and when it has a name you treat it better, like a son, who you wouldn't ridicule in public. I also read on the internet that Tom Selleck`s moustache has it's own publicist... that is not the sign of a silly little joke.

Now next thing you now it will be Mecember and the rookies and their wives who allowed them to do this this "one time" will go back to their clean little faces just when their moustaches are coming into their prime, which is a damn shame i say... like the week you can go to the water cooler, hold court and bark down some facts about brewing stout and for a while there nobody even notices the moustache, because the moustache is just part of the full package that barks authority.

If you want you can Help me raise more money than the rookies on my "team" because this is embarrassing but i realize the fact of donor fatigue.

I'm starting with the "handelbar" with sharp straight lines on the sides that can grow into a fine "standard" moustache in time, so that when I'm sunning in the carribean I'm also looking good. I want to feel that moustache moving with the tide on a moonlight night... What can i say, I'm a romantic.

this happened today

It happened that i had Kaiya (6 years) today and no twins (3 years) so we could do things that we usually can't, therefore, a hike in the Mountains was in order. We went up one of the local mountains to a small lookout and had ourselves some high-end chocolate as a way to say to the world we are the greatest. Looking down at the city we notice the quiet and just go explore for a while... I note that there are many berries in the bushes, we try some but they are getting past their prime.

We come to a spot where i see a Canada Jay, also know as a Grey Jay or Whiskey Jack and i remember an old trick even though its not really my thing i give it a go for my kids sake. I hold out a piece of a granola bar and the bird comes flying down into my hand in front of Kaiya and takes the food. Normally i would't do that for the main reason that the bird feet could be a hub for parasites, but my daughter, is impressed but yet instinctively says "should a bird eat human food ?", to which of course the answer is no for a few reasons. You ever hear about that mouse study where they fed wild mice, or moles perhaps human food and they developed the wrong kind of fat.. you see there is brown fat and white fat, and if you are in the wild you need the brown fat to survive. The point being animals should get naturally occurring food (if there is any left after humans have devastated the natural world)... actually while we are on that note Kaiya said on the way up on the path "is this man made, and if man made it would they make it like this"... i said no "man would find a way to screw it up"

anyhoo, there we are on the mountain me with one hand that has touched bird foot and we decide to feed the bird one more time... the bird is way off up high in a tree about 100 yards away so i hold up the food and start clicking... she asks me if i can talk to birds as earlier i flushed a thrush out of the bushes with a Phsss phsss phss sound... once a birder always a birder so i call the bird down and we observe the flight path down to my hand and the bird takes the food and flies away... and then the rustling in the bushes as a bear comes out to see who it is that is giving away all the food. Reason 2 not to give small wild animals food... because big wild animals might be watching.

we beat a hasty retreat and Kaiya thought it was a good lesson for her... I agreed.

a new office

or headquarters for that matter... you see i have moved my operation to another part of the house, made a few upgrades and am feeling a "fresh new vibe".

Which begs the question... what is my operation?

Jesus effin crouch, why do i have to ask myself these derailing questions just when i start to feel like i am on a roll... and then publicly state that i am on a roll which is a sure fire way to rattle the bones of the OMEN GODS.

Now don't get all crazy one me and think that our good warrior old S Robertson has lost his faith and turned into some religious sucker like the pack of fools at my door this morning trying to give me a pamphlet on the truth. "The truth" sounded good but the pamphlet was horse shit and the dudes couldn't see it... they kept saying you see it's written right here, and i had to say sure sure but i could write a pamphlet and print it and i could write it so that it says "Ron sucks shit out of shit ass"... and i could even put in a picture of you and have an arrow pointing at your picture and then come to your house Ron, and disturb you from a fine bong hit to tell you about the truth that is written in my pamphlet... but the thing is Ron, it might not be true... do you suck shit out of shit ass Ron?

Apparently Ron has never and will never suck shit out of a shit ass... so i apologized for insinuating such but none the less i asked Ron and his partner if they caught my drift.. but like a fine tuned salesman they just dropped back into the routine so i had to shoe them away asap.

But the OMEN GODS are different... it's more about balance in the universe and pure mathematical probability. On a grander scale it is probably more about self blame... if you said something couldn't happen and it happens than you are presented with the opportunity to hate yourself for tempting fate by declaring it couldn't happen.

I do believe in "karma" and positive mind training.

Karma- good things happen to people doing good things because they spent their energy in a way that inspires positivity and hence are in the vicinity to benefit, and perhaps through their efforts they will recognize opportunity when it comes as they will understand the process of how good things work.

positive mind- if you believe you can you probably can, if you believe you will fail you are done.

One thing i know for sure is that gaining direction in ones life does not come by accident, but rather the result of a committed effort on a number of smaller fronts.

hot damn...9 years of the chronicles

August 14, 2001

What is a website?

How is it useful?

Why should people go there?

And is this going to be an enjoyable pursuit for myself?

These Questions give rise to other questions for example

What is professional with respect to art and a rock and roll band?

In fact who even cares about quality?

it is indeed a fast food industry, and I'm stuck in the middle of it. This is the roadbed website, Your connection to the Super Robertson take on things. I am an artist, funny the word artist to declare yourself one its kind of like barging in and joining some club. Art is cool right, and cool attracts idiots, posers, and confused souls desperately subscribing for a sense of belonging. Of course Art attracts lovers, lovers of things beautiful and you can find beauty in anything. Don't get me wrong I mean i love innocence and I want people to have a good life.

Talked myself into a corner...am I really going to post this on the web site...I don't really know what else to do I make music, dabble in visual Art, make movies and write things that may be classified under the concept of poetry. In my spare time I like to camp, play music on nude beaches, create things and play hockey. My problem is this.... I have this band with The Shockker and Two Sticks called Roadbed...We are truly Independent and we would like to be heard because we believe we have a lot to offer music. So basically what's happening is that this here will be the Super Robertson take on the life and times of Roadbed a book written before your eyes. Now I hate the term book because it alludes to a final product which is not really the goal here...anyhoo I am going to post this up on our site let the chips fall where they may and let what happens next happen next...

-SR

that was the first post ever to this here blog series
2001-2005 the original Super Robertson chronicles are hosted on the old Roadbed website... i remember it taking years just to get audio up... now you can embed video wit a few simple clicks... yep the old Internet has come a long way. i didn't know what a blog was... apparently the term was first coined in 1999, 2 years before. Apparently "blogaroo" is not an official term although a quick search will show that it is gaining momentum. "Bloggi apparatus" is still deep under cover.

2005-present has been with this here blogger site under the heading "Super Robertson chronicles II". the blog itself was originally titled by the late great Gareth Evans... which reminds me i should look at that old mountain goat footage/ cliff jumping... things to do.

I like the fact that i started with a rack of questions, many of them remain relevant and up for debate to this day. i think we spend so much time in front of computers now that we are beginning to alter our sense of "normal". the best times i had this summer so far were when i was out far away from a computer, away from the reach where you thing that something MIGHT be important enough for you to stop doing something valuable to do something "status orientated".

when i first started this it was out of the need to "keep new content coming" so that people would have a reason to come back to the band site... i also thought it would be great for the band members to have their own page where they said something in an individual context to give a greater picture of the band. I have since learned to rely only on myself for these type of ventures.


Have i accomplished anything?

of course, any practice at articulating the thoughts in your head can only be good to help re-enforce who you are, what you believe in, and why it matters, and as a songwriter this is key no matter how illiterate you come off. always good to keep a keen sense of humour about everything because in a world of people with sticks up their asses you need to laugh at somebody so never count yourself out of the game.

on that point i also believe that a fine trigger to be insulted is a great weakness... you do what you do for the reasons you do them and if somebody tries to damn you and you let them you are allowing their shortcomings to affect the plan of your long game.

When i look back at all of the things that people have told me about the forces and drives that carry the persona of Super Robertson I'd have to say that almost all of them are bull shit. I do feel comfortable with why i do things now, something that perhaps wasn't the case years ago... i wonder if my kids will ever read all of this... EGAD!

random thoughts

random is correct

I had so many earlier, thoughts were like raindrops in a downpour free to soak me like some sucker at a casino who doesn't care what he loses chasing the dream... random thoughts seemed easier on the skytrain when you are sitting there staring out the window and you are so bored that all of your thoughts seem wonderful in some unique way.

Hockey thoughts, music thoughts, plant thoughts, BBQ thoughts, insane maniac woman thoughts, crazy kook thoughts, lyric thoughts, real person thoughts, why is this world so fucked thoughts, free thoughts, sex thoughts... how fucking stupid is a list of thoughts... it is almost anti thought when you think about it.

take your chances on the long ball from time to time in life... don't bet the house on it

this makes no sense and should be deleted immediately

right now i assume "immediately" is spelt correctly because i does not have a red line under it, but more pressing is that the word spelt does have a red line under it which can put unusual pressure on a man who knows where his Achilles heel is at... so when he goes to do the spell check spelt is apparently ok... was it just not really a word until a while ago when the gatekeepers of proper language use finally submitted recently and allowed it to be a word


right now i assume "immediately" is spelled correctly because i does not have a red line under it, but more pressing is that the word spelled does not have a red line under it which means we can put a stop to this nonsense once and for all.

spelt is like a pelt, a beacon to murder.

is plastic better than pelt?

pelt is sustainable, i mean to say was sustainable, but we fucked that up... oh well acid off a ducks bath... i mean water, perhaps oil

a good victory

Our hockey team won a good victory tonight with 6-5 victory... rather crazy because we were up 4-1 at one point and looked to have the game under control which is always what happens when you think you have things under control. I believe we were going into the third period up 4-1 and then we got soft in our own end and became the masters of the "flick shot special"... the flick shot special is when you move the puck from an area of danger to an area of greater danger with a little weak four foot bouncing chump ass shot.

Our key to victory was our ability to answer when necessary... the opposition tied the game @ 4-4 and immediately we answered back to go up 5-4, and then they tied it up again and then 40 seconds later we went back on top with a sneak wrist shot from the high slot that nobody saw coming and it found a way through the 5 hole.

We were able to shut the door for the final 4 minutes through a series of fire drills and scintillating saves from our goalie Dave... there was luck and hard work and diving for pucks... there were scrums on the boards and a few chops to the ribs. We won the last few key draws of the game which helped kill a bit of time before the flick shot special had a chance to apply a sense of doom to the team but in the end it was one giant successful flick shot that saved the day. High enough to clear the defense but not hard enough to go for icing.

It is funny how a collapsing game can feel good if you come away with a victory. On many levels it should be a failure, but i tend to be heavy on labeling things a failure... for example we won a game 2-1 last week and i declared that it felt like a defeat... and it did... we should have stomped their balls but it was a lack of compete inspired by the probability of sure victory that got me steaming.

I thought generally tonight we had a good for check which caused the turnovers, which kept the pressure on but then when we sat back and they had some D men that could skate and that caused problems. You have to get on those bastards immediately before they get a chance to get some speed and confidence.

I played pick up hockey the other night and when you play pick up you either wear a dark or a light sweater. I have been going dark lately in a effort to play with a few other fathers in the neighbourhood... i call us the V5T line, stemming from the postal code of course. Anyhoo we had a good D man show up an play dark right around the time i was assessing the talent on the White team, which happened to be a scary scenario... i skated up to him and said... I'm glad you are dark, and then we got talking and he said he never worries who is on the other side... because it is up to us to assure victory... I like that attitude... we won the match 4-1 which is an incredible feat that a stacked team of talent only scored one goal in a hour... most of the credit goes to the goalie... he almost got a shutout... i don't think i have ever seen that in an hour long pick up game. None the less our team played hard and over their head for most of the game... there was a fearless element to our attack... we scored on our chances and defended with honor. what else could you ever want?

idk

Do you know what IDK stands for? It means "I don't know" and i found this out just moments ago when i figured that it was time for a little blogaroo but i needed a topic so i went on to chatroulette to ask some random stranger to give me a topic. i ran into (among many things) a pack of young girls (20 years old) who saw me and yelled gross, started laughing and then called me a pedobear... which is not a good accusation, but that's what you get for going on chatroulette. It's a place where people jack off to each other... which is fine by me but then people on the site assume that everybody wants to jack off to them which is not always the case... not saying that i wouldn't WANT to jack off to them, i just wouldn't... being a father of girls and more importantly a man on a mission for a topic for a blog... which is clearly more important.

The amazing thing is that the girls never use a person like me for information... sure i'm a worn, fat, balding, ugly, unkept bulgy eyed sideburned old bastard but i also know the mind of a young man and could provide some insights if people were interested in fully using the form of communication. It is almost like a real opportunity lost... i always like talking to older people on the off chance they can give me a few nuggets of wisdom or even better some well defined cases of the stupidity of mankind.

anyhoo i finally got somebody to give me a topic and the topic was idk, which was basically an answer to the question "please give ma a topic"... "i don't know" was the answer (in the form of idk) which is a good answer because it is an honest one and one that people rarely admit to. There are so many things we don't know but rarely will we admit that we don't know them. We just tend to carry on like we know the answer because we might seem stupid if we didn't... and surly people would assume we are stupid if we said that.

The other side of the window is kind of like this bizarre belief that technology will save humans no matter what damage we do to the environment that supports our ability to live... in this case we say we don't know but we actually do know... we being the knowlege that is available for those who want to see it. It is then that "i don't know" becomes an excuse to just carry on and say "more study is needed".

I don't know a lot of things... languages have always eluded me, why people pay for cable TV is another... i don't know why people ruin their lives to "be real" for a chance in a million to be a rock and roll star, i don't know how i got here other than a series of events where one chance won over all of the others... i don't know why i go on chatroulette as nobody ever wants to talk to me... i think i'm pretty good on the chats... i come up with a lot of points that other people do not... and maybe that's the problem

IDK

Rage barber.. the hunter becomes the hunted

So i went to a barber the other day... probably the first time in over a decade. I have always been from the school that a real man can cut his own hair and then walk around with his head held high singing "i will not buy". There are not many of us left out there in this fast food hipster world... but hey "i just gotta be me".

The big draw for me was that i had inside information that the barber i was going to liked to get a little hot under the collar about some issues that had to do with the development of our neighbourhood. I figured it was a no brainer... go in there, get in the chair and then try to get on a few issues that a friend of mine had mentioned really gets this barber going... in principle the idea is golden... get the barber going stoke the rage all while a little clippity clip clippity clip clip clip happens to my head... how could one possibly lose?

How you lose is when you go in so confident in your plan that you think you can not fail... and you focus is all on the success of your plan and how your plan is going to unravel and you chuckle and cluck to yourself about how it's going to be so great... and educational also... i mean that, I'm sure a barber knows a lot of stuff about the neighbourhood... i was hoping for a lecture from a a man who i heard can get quite animated over certain issues.

Funny that it occurred to me that it would be educational because a lifelong barber would have his ear to the ground and his thumb on the pulse of the neighbourhood, but it failed to occur to me that this same man would be a pro at reading and dealing with all kinds of people, and there is me thinking it will be a cakewalk, which of course is a critical error. The best rage heroes only go off in fine form when they are in the proper environment. I of all people I should know this, and it was a great failure of mine to not see this... almost like that time when we had the rage cab driver that got to know me and sometimes he would have to pull over by the side of the road so he could turn around and point his finger at me to exclaim his rage... I was a mailman at the time and i had a route that was dubbed a "cab" route, which meant that i went out to the route in a cab because it was far away from the station and the bus service would have taken more time than just paying for a cab... anyhoo i had a buddy that was on a route nearby that was a bus route but since it was on my way i would take him in the cab and drop him off... he was a good guy and he was eager to learn the ways of a rage cabbie... originally he was taken aback that our cab ride had taken so long because the cab driver went bananas over an issue (happened to be the George W. Bush war that was started under obvious false pretences)... anyhoo the driver knew me and was comfortable with our conversations. To make a long story mid lenght my friend was originally a bit nervous but learned to enjoy the rage lectures and after a few we got in the cab and he said "so anything making you mad".. this was a rookie mistake because it put the cab driver in an odd position and there was no rage that day and i scolded my friend for his silly approach.

and then years later i made the same mistake... i walked into a barber who i didn't know me but knew how to deal with people thinking i was going to call the shots.

When i walked in there he had a friend there and the barber was cutting somebodies hair so the friend and i started talking cameras and i let it slip that i was there for a "social experience" and the room changed like a wind coming from the other direction... it was probably then that the hunter became the hunted but the hunter failed to realize that because the hunter was suffering from confidence induced delusions and that is never good for a sportsman... as you can well imagine.

And then when i got in the chair the barber asked me what i wanted and i said i didn't care just go at it... he wanted no part of that and said he doesn't "style" but does what people want, and then i went further in my folly and said i didn't care what my head looked like and i wouldn't be angry with any cut... and then i mentioned that i usually cut my own hair to which he replied that he could see that by the fact that it was all completely uneven (this brought laughter in the shop)... and then i tried to explain that this cut was actually incomplete... to which he agreed before I could explain that while i was performing that particular cut an emergency happened and i had to stall the cut process and forgot to get back to it which in fact put me in an odd position of looking like some deranged lunatic.

I had these nice overgrown sideburns that i was going to refuse to let the barber cut thinking that he would be frazzled by focusing on the items that i had expected we would talk about but instead i took a savage beating and i spent the entire haircut on defense and then when it came time for the sideburns he just plainly said that it would look stupid to go around with the elongated sideburns... i tried to resist but his friend mentioned that i was indeed in for a social experience and then the clippity clip happened... i had already stated that i didn't care, i was indifferent and just along for the ride... essentially meaning that the barber was the driver and i was the passenger. It was like walking into a room with a bag of marbles and the bag spits and your marbles scatter.

By the time i was done i looked like a fat middle aged salesman with cheap sideburns and a comb over to protect a balding hairline... i limped out of there and went home with my hair out of my eyes which was good.

I think I'll go back but I'll be prepared next time.

what are we doing

I am the leader here right... this is the super Robertson chronicles part 2

What do i have to say... i don't even know... it's hard to say where was I...it seemed like i had a number of good points a while ago but that is now just time lost. That is the essence of life, it is what you make of it and as you get older you loose the ability to remember the pure comedy of all the great moments of the day that could be described in a blog as fine comedy if portrayed properly but then there is reality and all the things that need to be done in the day and in the end it is all just memories... memory is cheap what do you think?

Digital memory is cheap on 2010, but the memories of a life are priceless... memory is now a word that should be re-defined because a memory that a human had was something that stuck in the mind for some reason... and now memory is just everything that happened has now been recorded on memory.

I think I'm losing my focus... i must go way back to the foundations of the reasons that i took the path that i am on to answer these very basic questions that i now have trouble answering much less asking.

Telus fucks me, other people and the environment again

so i had 2 cribs i was trying to give away on craigslist and i got no replies for some time and it became this obsession i was trying to give them to anybody... if i saw a pregnant woman i would go ask her if she needed a crib... finally i lost it and tried to drop them off at the salvation army... but the Salvation Army won't take them because people are too insane over "Crib safety" and in today's society nobody is smart enough to make a judgement call. the cribs were fine... so yesterday i took them too the dump... it was a long line up and i was very depressed to be dumping 2 perfectly good items that apparently nobody in this world will use due to what i thought was an overzealous safety paranoia... it was sad it cost me a few hours of a holiday Monday, gas and it left me depressed.

having some email problems so i went to the telus site and realized that Telus only sends me some of the emails that are suppose to come my way... and there was a good dozen that were responses to my crib giveaway by people who could have really used the cribs and would have been very grateful to have them.

but fucking Telus fucked us all

I'm sure there is a jackass right now saying "well have you checked your settings... blaa bla bla"... i have received emails from craiglist before under similar circumstances. it's just a damn shame... a totally preventable waste that could have gone completely in the other direction.

new post

The garden is full of spinach an i myself am a salad king... for now nothing quite like fresh spinach. the trick is to water it at around 3:00PM and then harvest it at around 6:00 PM just before dinner.
then the game becomes preparation... how to prepare you salad... i found that with a little shredded carrots one can make a wrap of carrots in spinach leaves. it is so tasty it doesn't even need anything, just pure flavour. There is that word again... the one that is correctly spelled but yet is not acknowledged due to some country having a different idea about what is tight and wrong than another country. That's life however and the key to life on that level is to accept the things that aren't worth changing. There is a great religious saying about god giving you the power to change the things you can and to accept the things you cannot and the wisdom to know the difference.

and that's where our "Rage Hero" fails... the rage hero cannot accept the things he cannot change and so he tried to change them with brute force and then.

frozen spinach is for lasagna, fresh spinach is for kings and soon spinach season will be over and one must prepare by getting the beans in the ground where the spinach once ruled

i guess i need a new post... or blogaroo for that matter

you see i posted the wrong blogaroo on this blog, due to some automatic sign in fiasco, and once again i think of the mule back in his office getting an URGENT email notice that YES IN FACT THE SUPER ROBERTSON CHRONICLES 2 has been updated... and then i can imagine the Master Mule almost spraining a wrist frantically clicking on that mouse to get the latest version of S Robertson bone wisdom... and then finding in fact some re-hashing of an event he was actually at and surly could have done a better job at summarizing without of course the bruised groin story, which again is probably too much information when you think about it.

the lesson here is always be aware of what blog you are writing in... like when i start S. Robertson's man Gardening blog the last thing we need is some lunatic going off on a political rant... unless of course it is a rant about genetically modified seeds.. and boy oh boy is that a good one... what the hell am i doing here.

how a song made my life better

well i had a problem last year and in dealing with the problem i proved myself a "rage hero"

Rage hero- a person who reacts to a disaster in a manor that makes the disaster worse.

so i wrote a song about it and some people heard the song and recognized the problem and those people had administrative duties with respect to my problem and an opportunity arose for them to help me with my problem and they did that and now my problem is solved and on top of that the situation that had elements of problem now have elements of symbiosis... and that a good thing

the ARK

"I don't know of any expedition that ever went looking for the ark and didn't find it,"

-Paul Zimansky, an archaeologist specializing in the Middle East at Stony Brook University in New York State.

you have to love that quote


Apparently a group of Cristian explorers are 99.9% sure they have found the remains of Noah's Ark.

got me thinking about the whole thing... apparently legend has it that a mountain in Turkey is the final resting place of the arc, where Noah and 2 creatures of every kind went to repopulate the earth.

what do i think of all of this?

I think it's time for another flooding.

so say I'm Noah... i guess it would be Super's Arc... I would be on a boat with a lady 100 venomous snakes (apparently there are 50 kinds of venomous snakes), a stack of stinging ants, scorpions... not to mention an agitated rhino pair a few hungry crocodiles, a pair of all of the large cats...

i think Super's ark will actually be a large barge towed by a tugboat... it would be a suped up tugboat with shag carpeting and a lava lamp

no no... i guess to get the gig you need to be one with the animal kingdom.

Oh well

i was just going to go to sleep

but then it happened... i read the news, and the obvious happened... i am now enraged. It's kind of odd, isn't the news there to strike fear and then the fear can be manipulated to exercise political will? And then the logical thinkers just all start swearing and talking to themselves and are written off as crazies.

It was all about the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico:

"I don't think anybody foresaw the circumstance that we're faced with now," said another BP spokesman, Steve Rinehart.

It just drives me insane when you hear the "nobody could have ever foresaw" card... a card that gets played every time some man made operation that makes a lot of money for a few people goes ape shit and destroys all kinds of lives... it's always "nobody could have foresaw". So you are speaking for everybody now, because you are so high and mighty and all of those people who have suggested we not do these things but nobody listened, and now that disaster has struck their voices just never happened...

Nobody could have predicted?

Nobody could have seen the financial meltdown, except all of the people who predicted it and warned against the insanity going on leading up to the disaster... but those people don't count... so nobody could have seen it.

Robertson's rule- if there is a Human involved then there can be Human error, and sooner or later there will be.
The human error can come in many forms... error in construction, error in design, error in monitoring, error in not listening to logic because money pays you otherwise... the only thing for sure is that it will happen sooner or later.

If a big earthquake hits Vancouver and the city of Richmond sinks into the ocean, somebody may say "nobody could have seen this coming", but it has been predicted by many... the human error would have occurred long ago when some fools decided to put a city on unstable Grade A Farmland... the kind of thing that a city might need to produce food one day. Just saying but nobody could possibly see that coming.

When fresh water is the most precious thing on earth the people in Alberta might be wearing the goat horns having turned many of their fresh lakes and watershed into a collection of toxic oil ponds, and somebody will say "nobody could have ever foresaw", which of course is utter horse shit, and grossly insulting to all of the left wing commie pinkos that have spent their lives energy trying to tell people exactly that.

Being right about things is something that humans react strongly to... although sometimes it is a nice feeling to be right, i don't think people really feel joy about disasters. For most people, i think, the reason they are against exploration of that nature (oil), is because they truly care about the state of the planet, and are trying to make a difference so that the planet will be live able and enjoyable for human and all forms of life. It gives people joy to see nature... these people get a sense of calm to be out in the "natural world" and so that is why they worry about these kind of developments... because nature is unpredictable... didn't we learn that from the Titanic?

So when you are some hot shot massive company that's made billions on a product that is causing all kind of grief, perhaps stepping up to a microphone and uttering a ridiculous statement that basically tries to skirt blame and nullify any opponents points that they have been making clearly for years and years, is a bit of an asshole thing to do, don't you think?

here we go again

so once again a head official who made a insane call in favour of L.A. and against a Canadian team has to come on TV to try to explain why the call was made and ends up babbling away for like 4 minutes contradicting himself and all.

kind of like this:



Oh well water under the bridge EH!... no biggie.

Of course tonight was only game 3 of the first round and any team that can't kill penalties is dead anyway.

Sure i believe Sedin was aware of what was happening when it was happening, but that's what great players do let it happen. Like a great defenseman running "unintentional interference". That's what you do you as a forward you stop in front of the net and fight for position and if the puck goes off you and into the net that's a great play.

Just seems kind of weird that the last game was decided on an overtime power play where a referee decided that a defenseman purposely played the puck with his foot as he was cut in the face and trying to get off just a few feet from the bench.

I mean Vancouver lost by 2 goals anyway but the balance of bad calls seems tilted... but as the study goes we competitive people always see it that way.

the most annoying thing now is that i watched the game unnessicarily. You see i had Choir practice when the game was on, but a neighbour and fellow hockey man (also a person with multiple children) taped the game on PVR and started watching it later. A fine plan to put the kids to bed and then watch the game at your speed plowing through all of the silly comercials and commentary. Which in theory is good, but in practice was bad. Seeing L.A. get the benefit of all these calls has brought a lot of the rage back... need to rewatch some Olympic Hockey and put this nonsense out of my soul.

it's always hard to try to find something to write about after a big loss

So i go on chatroulette to change the subject and end up talking to some kid baseball player from Las Vegas who happens to have a broken arm and some ligament damage. It was a good chat that almost didn't happen... he tried to get rid of me 2x but i kept popping back up (some weird glitch), and then he finally said what you 3x... and i made a few sports puns one of then having to do with 3 strikes you are out, which got us on a baseball roll. I started telling him about "windmill Robertson" who tore up the Scarborough little league in 1983 setting a record that still stands to this day (most batters hit by a pitch)... you see i was a little wild as a picture so i had to compensate by playing the inside of the base... back the batter off the plate a bit and then go for the strikeout... which ended up more often in a line drive double into center field. Later i was moved to shortstop but apparently it's not cool to go into a swearing fit when you bobble an easy ground ball in the 6th inning. then i was moved to the outfield where on one play i would make an amazing diving catch that all thought impossible to get and then on the next play i would have a routine fly ball bounce off the bone in my hand and to the ground.

The game of hockey has always suited my nature... aggressive fore-check, shoot from anywhere and force your own rebound... attack defend... he who can last the strongest the longest wins... there is great technical merit but one can be effective with smart and fearless play. It's a game where you are expected to physically intimidate the opposition and the game is constantly changing so a new play is always available and a high risk move can make you a hero or a goat in an instant... i guess that's the high slider in baseball on a 3-2 pitch... but when that pitch is hit deep to center field the fielder can't make an amazing play send it back and score for his own team.

who cares... it's like splitting hairs... that said Hockey is a better game... which puts us back to the start and why i was so bitter in the first place.. a game lost that should have been won... that familiar empty feeling of failure finds it's cosy home above my diaphragm and below my heart.

what a day

isn't it annoying when people whine about what a hard day they had... that's the first key indicator that you are dealing with a failure. especially when it comes from our part of the world... Gee i woke up had the opportunity for a nutritious breakfast... ran the tap for a while so my glass of clean water would be cold enough, then took a shit in drinking water, checked my facebook and had to go through all of these messages some of them sarcastic and i had to re-assure myself everything was OK... then i had a big lunch and threw some of it away because it was just too much food for me at that time... you get the picture.

watching the news the other day and there was some big news on what to do with the "space program"... and people were happy that space exploration will continue, with getting near an asteroid and going to mars on the radar.

I tend to be a big fan of learning to live on this planet together without destroying it as the key and most basic fundamental problem humanity faces... but that would cost money with little chance of glory.

It always amazes me that the majority of people living in "democracy" keep the people who forward the destruction of the planet in power with absolute vigor.

Irony alert... the new cell phones are "green"... which has come to mean planet friendly (apparently). Could a nuclear bomb be made with some recycled metal and then get the consumer classification "green" by the ministry of the truth and the environment branch of the economic watchdog? If the right form were filled out I'm sure it could be done.

Different topic... i was out the other night and was asked a few questions on the nature of the music business... the questioner was looking for short "sound byte" answers and i kept try to tell them that that was in fact an essay question... but then we both agreed that nobody has time to read essays anymore because they are so long and you have to remember the beginning when you get to the end... which is really too much to ask, which then in fact basically answered the question in the first place.

people just want to stand on a quote for 5 minutes and then move on to the next moment of awesomeness.

what the world taught me... be smart, get what you can and then duck... not overly community minded... like the bees who work together make little waste and perform. I guess the bees don't live long enough to get to the point where they say "fuck this shit I'm tired of building cones... I'm making ovals"... the bee that tried that shit would immediately be carried to the exit and that would be it... no trial... no nothing... that bee's carcass goes back to mother earth to start again.

funny i always think of humanity in terms of other organisms in an effort to see how "off track" we have become. anybody who disagrees with that is a fool, i say. How can Humanity willingly destroy our own natural food sources, perhaps irreversibly, and barely give a rat's ass or at least totally fail to see that that is what is happening.

so we are all totally distracted and at the end of the day our distractions are causing us grief so we whine about it. In fairness we are stuck in a shit hole system where you just have to do or be damned... and then the crazy guy on the street who is saying the world is ending is actually right but he smells bad and won't get a good night sleep on the cold streets. Which begs the question... what would that guy do if we all tore down the city and made it farmland again and worked the farm together to get the food for the winter long party... he might be walking in the field saying "those turnip seeds are cursed by the colon gods"... in which case we would need to collectively do what the bees would do and sting the shit out of that wino.

don't get me wrong... i realize that there are some flaws in tonight's ideas... anytime you try to tackle the problems of humanity on a few liters of amber ale you are sure to drive down a few one-way streets in the wrong direction.

notes from chatroulette

what will they do... staring at the screen... one with his hand on his head... squintey eyes and a moustache and glasses... nothing typed a closet with one shirt and a crooked hanger. and on my end i correct myself but id does not matter because i am not heard for the things i type... who figures anything anymore... focus and a head scratch i wave goodbye

not bad thanks... what are you listening too... nothing Ha

China Brazil... wow that's a big male member... it always amazes me how forgetful people are when it comes to this type of thing... somebody could easily capture that and put it on youtube and then you could become as we say "the Jack of all asses".

Grey lines that run diagonally mean you don't want to play or perhaps you want to test the water before you jump in. Remember the signals when TV went off the air in the old days? Or how about that time Homer Simpson was Mr. Plow and he had his commercial and it came on just before the lines and the whole family stayed up too watch it.

camera come on... guy rubbing groin... he says hi... me giving the benefit of the doubt type hello... then i get you want to talk dirty... i reply not really

now we are back to people looking for a naked girl and finding me instead... i always relished the role of the spoiler

on another unrelated note i went to an open house today just for laughs (it was in the hood) always a good chance to get house ideas... and like everybody and his brother was there... the house had 2 bedrooms and other families from our street said to me "what are you doing here" to which i had to reply "same thing you are"

there were 3 offers on the table for everybody to see.. the plot thickens
I am not insane.

somebody was pulling the goalie in a balaclava... i typed good cover man... but they might have your ip address

ahh the old new post... a kid screaming, a tv on, some children watching the tV... and in the other window are various chatroulette "partners", most of them don't stick around long enough for a good dose of Robertson wisdom.

Many are looking for video sex... if that's what you call it... if phone sex is called that then i guess that would be it. I'm a natural nudist so i am not scarred by seeing these things... i think i might keep a magnifying glass by the table so that the next time i catch a guy pulling his goalie i can pull out the optic and put it to work. Most of these people i think are hoping for a naked girl and not the balding disgruntled fat body that happens to carry my soul... don't worry i'm just being hard on myself, remember life is a laugh... and then at nightime in the bed you give your goalie a workout off camera.

That's the way i roll. well now CT is now home... what happens if she walks in the room and at just that time some dude is yanking his member... would that look good?

perception can get in the way of reality some times...

Skypeing with random strangers... the lead line i have being going with these days is "S Robertson advice professional at your service".. i figured that could get the ball rolling in a direction i can deal with. Some are offended, some amused, and then there are other reactions.

well dinner time

it is possible that i lost my mind on that last post... fore sure the greatest goal scored in Vancouver all things considered... but hey... shit i forgot what i was going to write... this is happening all too often... it was more about technology with respect to shithole band websites and social networking, that all seems rather insane now that we got thinking about a grand victory. i think i was going to try and write some lyrics

i signed myself to twitter
and a widget that will fitter
right tight in the website for the updates and all

but everything that i say
is really not to gay
and now i can alienate...

i don't know

at least i had ice cream cake


Social media ain't too friendly when you have a fist full of fingers/ why do we do anything/... ahhh simple barley old sport. Never use "WE" when you mean "I" and your sanity is perhaps in question (wrongly of course)... it get's people a little "birdy" whatever the hell that means he says as he eyes another red line. The point being, or one of them anyway is that NEVER ASSUME MOTIVATION. Often times the motivation people have is rather different than the motivation that one may perceive from the actions that got motivated. Good folks want to stat punching people in the head over that kind of stuff. In a perfect world people who had points to make could make them and others could ponder those points and classify them accordingly, and then of course everybody else would just have to shut the fuck up... and don't even go outside where you might be tempted to think something out loud causing what we would have to classify as an "overhear error", which of course would activate a judiciary body to come and make a declaration of further insanity.

Blog regret
the greatest regret you lost all that time your a loser
Facebook regret
who gives a shit some assholes will just make a comment
Twidder regret
a little regret it comes and goes fast then it's gone again
Myspace regret
a common regret at least there is music a playing
google regret
a stinging regret of that time that you exposed your member

there's nothing you do but sit in your chair posting updates and checking the status
no rock and roll no hockey goal but the dishwasher cleans all your glasses

horn solo

OK I'll say it... the greatest Goal in Canadian history

Paul Henderson scored a huge goal in 1972 to stop Canada from going into a nervous breakdown over their Hockey superiority.

Wayne Gretzky and Mario Lemieux team up to win the Canada Cup in 1987.

But Sidney Crosby's goal made the Olympics. Yea we were on a roll but can you imagine if we lost that game?

I'm an Vancouver resident, taxpayer, homeowner, hockey enthusiast, Canadian patriot and parent among other things. I voted against the Olympics in that referendum back all those years ago... i remember waking up thinking "right on we are going to shut this thing down once and for all today"... i was wrong. My point was it's a bad idea to give corrupt politicians with deep ties to developers a free pass to make hordes of money... I'm not wrong about that. I'm glad we have bettered our transit system but I'm not sure about closing ice rinks for a few years canceling kids hockey seasons so that a good working rink can be "upgraded".

My wife an I also seriously considered buying into the Olympic village which was being billed as a sustainable community at one time... we even went to a few meetings... enough to realize that that was not the case.

I could rant about the Olympics but my point was more to set the tone that I was not a Ya Ya go Olympics kind of guy. But sports and my country are things I like and I suffered through the CTV coverage... remind me to go ape shit over that one in a later blogaroo... and got into the Olympics.

So come the final event of the Olympics and Canada is set to break the record for the most gold medals by any country ever, having just broken the record for most gold medals from a host country, and it's hockey... our game... you saw the adds.

If we lose that game on our own soil in the city hosting the games it's going to be an all time low. Can you imagine sitting through the closing ceremonies watching a group of lumberjacks tow an inflatable moose around a stadium waving at people after they just lost one of the greatest big games ever? I don't think so. People wouldn't have been cheering and acting gaily... remember what happened when the Canucks lost to the Rangers in game 7 in 1994 (the game in New York)... there was a fucking riot and some dude took a rubber bullet to the head (perhaps he had it coming... i don't know). What i do know is that me, an Olympic non believer, headed out of the house that last Sunday night to witness the vibe and take a few hundred high fives from the packed city streets... i saw police high fiving drunks... the police chief himself posing for pictures with smiling Canada jersey wearing happy people. I saw people shake hands with police thanking them saying "you guys did a great job" and the police smiled back and said "you guys did a good job too"... lots of garbage but very little damage... everybody was happy as can be.

Canada as a nation has lost Canada Cup's before...(now called the World Cup for some insane reason).

If we lost in 72 you could say well we came back from what look like sure defeat and made a game of it.

If we lost in 2010... well we didn't we don't even need to go there.

notes on ideas

When i was in my first band and second band, i spent a lot of my life and energy and tooth enamel for that matter putting up posters for shows thinking that this huge effort was in some way worthwhile. I was trying to send a message, or like that big shift in a hockey game where you gave your team momentum with a hard fore-check... it doesn't transfer well in band situations. In a band usually everybody is insane in their own particular way and time and mis-assigned intentions grind the bastard down to useless powder

I was actually giving a lecture about the topic at a club the other night to anybody who would listen... but the scientist must now ask "what is it now that sucks my time and energy in a non constructive way?". The obvious answer being those insane maniac children of mine, but the "new postering" is the Internet. It's a better game because you are warm and dry and not fighting city workers and other poster people for real estate, and when your shit is up it stays up... notice the negative in "it stays up". A poster will evaporate in time but a link, bad video, drunken tirade can always come back to haunt you... unless you can rise above all of that and believe in:

"Cyril once observed that the only reason for writing was to create a masterpiece. But if you haven't got it in you to make a great work of art there is another option- you can become one."


-Solomon Gursky Was Here

Mordecai Richler

most folk don't have the proper training for that one... but I'm getting off topic again... my point was somewhere or somewhat to do with the reality that we always seem to kill our precious time in life doing things that don't matter. The plays change but the game is the same on some levels.

I don't know why i make music to be honest, i just do, i absolutely do NOT want to be a "rock star" under any circumstances. And i honestly believe that i mean that. I have a desire to make money to buy freedom, and i feel good sharing opinions through song, and i love to just sit on a groove and feel it.

why am i awake writing this?

the experiment started for the same reason as the posters, but it was meant to add a human element to the dilemma. I remember "band meetings" where i tried to get the other members to come up with one 3 line poem per week to put on the site to give a more varied view of the band but no can do... in the end the whole site was called "my personal vanity site" by some.

you know the song "your so vain you probably thing this song is about you".. my dad always though that song was hilarious. My point being a blog (called the chronicles) should be about you. I'm just a guy in a band and this is how i see the world, and I'm going to be wrong and i might be right from time to time, but why fudge it to the trends.

the raw facts are it's 2:00 am and i need sleep

i should just delete this shithole, but lets let the truth ring for good or ill.

I just punched back a few more episodes of "The Wire" and then down for a night of blogging, or is it a morning of blogging. After hanging with 3 kids all day a man can really get into a little of the old AM silence if you know what i mean. Probably not actually, because most of the sissies (no offense) with kids my age are sleeping away worried about what tomorrow might bring... my attitude (for some reason i use to always try to put "additute" but the spell check finally straightened me out... who said you can't teach an old dog new tricks). Anyhoo, which is not a word, by the way... my attitude is that tomorrow is going to happen anyway (if we are lucky).. he says as he hears a police or military helicopter go by.

In some ways it's a rather easy day tomorrow, i have a band coming to play the Super Robertson Supper Show, so all i have to do is either stay home, or show up and force the crowd to write a poem and then force the band to preform that said poem, which will be harder on them than on myself of course. I bet you old Mule is glad he is not on deck tomorrow night... Olympic security, band with set, lunatic with principle.

Principle is like values you have.
Principal is the guy in charge of your school.

I remember my mother telling me that your principal can be your "pal"... she was a primary school teacher. Sure as hell wasn't my pal. Principal's have no sense of humour, when it comes to practical jokes and their feelings for destruction of property are not aligned with my own...

I was a special kid in school... there were a few Principal's that saw something in me and tried to reach out and i always ended up disappointing.

It was the principal who encouraged me to be the only boy in "french club" and then when we sang that song at the assembly i pulled the curtain on us.

It was the principal who saw me as a "leader" for the band as my early trombone skills set a good pace, but then there were too many complaints from the clarinet section about kids getting bopped in the back of the head with the business end of the trombone "outer side", so then i got moved to percussion because i needed to hit things but the reins were too heavy and i snapped at the Christmas assembly in front of all of the parents and went for an ad-lib solo. My Pal showed such anger in those eyes and those lips... thin moustache quivering... sorry man,. I'm just a natural ass hole.

It's a lot of work watching television, or at least you can lose a lot of time that you could be doing something "productive". I have been watching a series that ran 5 seasons, mowing down a season a week, staying up late lying on a couch banging episode after episode... in some ways it beats wasting time on the internet and perhaps some down time is what i could use. It's sort of why i don't watch TV... I just have this obsessive way about things. On one hand i watch it on "my terms", meaning no commercials and not waiting week to week for an episode... the beauty of technology. But are My terms really watching TV all weekend? Doesn't sound like the kind of terms i would naturally subscribe to if we were like talking philosophy if you know what i mean.

It's been a strange week. On Monday i got a call from my sister telling me my Mother was in the hospital because she happened to be walking into a grocery store in the middle of a robbery and some dude ran out and bumped her out of the way, breaking her wrist and pelvis. My Mother is my fathers caregiver so you can do the math on that disaster, but it looks like things are being sorted accordingly.

It's the "incident" that some of us in the family have been worried about for some time. I have been trying to get my parents to scale back and get into a place more suited to their "changing lifestyle". I'm not meaning ship them into a "home" but rather find a place that's not a 3 level house with bedrooms and laundry and kitchen all on different floors. My parents, being resistant to change have laid out excuse after excuse and in the end i think the greatest respect one has to give somebody else is the right to live their life as they choose. So it was always "what if this happens?", with the logic following then "you won't have the choice", on the better to choose your destination. Still i do a lot of things i perhaps shouldn't (some might think), and i surly appreciate a stubborn self preservation attitude... it's what keeps people moving. I mean i probably wouldn't have made all of those records (or CD's) if people believed in me... i had to prove them wrong and the power to prove people wrong can be a mighty ally indeed.

where am i going with this?

i think it was a story in the book of Rumi where a farmer and his son live on a plot of land and some wild horses come onto the property and the neighbour says "that's good news" to which the man replies "we'll see", and then next day while trying to train the horses, the son is bucked off a horse and breaks his leg and the neighbour comes by and says "that bad news" and the man says "we'll see" and then the next day the king's men come around to collect all of the able bodied men to fight in a war in some far away land and the son can't go because he is lame and the neighbour says "that's good news"... you get the point.

Apparently my Mothers pelvis is actually fractured in a good place (for full recovery), so i guess I'm trying to put the best spin on this possible (with all of this philosophy talk). I am a man of faith although i have no use for religion personally, so from thousands of miles away i am trying to help my family find their way. Mom and i laugh on the phone, that's what I'm good for and in between chuckles i try to slide in some good options for the future.

One thing that pisses me off is going on to websites of "retirement" communities... may of them offer you a free gift to join in. To me that smells like shit. You are talking about your life and the most basic part of it your home, and no "free gift" will ever make that right. Then you start thinking about "management companies" and i recall my brief stint as Strata Council president "working" with the "Management company"... and in the end i ended up just cutting the fucking grass myself because it was just too damn stupid and expensive to get somebody else to tell somebody else to tell some pecker-head to cut the damn grass.

The crime aspect is weird and hard to swallow, but you can't change the past. Oddly enough years ago i was beaten on the streets for some reason I'll never know but it did give me a "timeout" and a chance to re-think the direction of my life and i look back at that as a positive moment. I remember they sent me to a psychiatrist to talk about it (being a victim of crime and all) and i laid that on him and he told me i was remarkable well adjusted.

here's hoping.

So there i was out and about meeting and greeting the people of the world, sharing stories and good cheer... perhaps even for a moment coming off like some easy going fun loving average Hammerhead. The wife of the man trusting in me to be a rational and sane person to bounce their "difference of opinion" off of me. Apparently the wife thinks it prudent to throw out the man's Kennwood cassette deck and life collection of tapes because of course they are so like "yesterday". For a moment i was thinking of agreeing with her and offering to come and remove the deck that could serve as an emergency backup to my backup tape deck... but then i came to my senses and openly questioned the said woman's sanity in a colourful manor which really didn't go over to well... it probably didn't help that the Husband's eyes literally bulged out of his head in agreement with my sentiment.

women are insane... take it from me, i live with 4 of the weasels.

case in point: take the old Man and Woman sharing a toilet scenario... all you ever hear is this bullshit about the man leaving the seat up... what, like the woman is so dumb she would actually sit down on a toilet seat with out looking and if for some reason she plunges into the toilet it is somehow the man's fault? Totally insane of course, but you know the real thing here... when women piss in a toilet they get piss on the underside of the toilet seat which the man then has to touch when lifting the seat so that he doesn't end up getting piss on the toilet seat. But the men never say anything they just clean it an carry on to the next task... natural team players.

How many men out there have gone to take a piss and got a finger full of piss concentrate, cleaned up and went downstaris to have to then defend their right for their stuff to not be under the constant threat of becoming deemed obsolete.

I guess that's why they make those "horse shoe" toilet seats

The other real problem here is that we have lost our focus in the modern era... it's all about newer better buy more and not about really enjoying what you have, which of course you can't do because you are so busy "competing" to just exist that there is no time (or the time get's lost on wasteful procedures) to enjoy the things you love.

I was talking to another couple an older retired couple and they mentioned that their life quality has increased ten fold since they retired. As he said "people ask me don't you get bored not having to go to work and have a purpose"... this guy and his wife have a few good purposes... great people.

When you look at the raw facts it looks unlikely that i will one day be able to retire and have my own personal space where i can set up all of my stuff and enjoy it as it was meant to be enjoyed... but at the same time you have to "dare to dream".

black and white

There was some discussion over the nature of blogs going heavy on the black and white text layout... very much like this old shit hole blog, so i was almost thinking of changing it but then when you open that can of worms you get windows that alert you to the fact that you need to re-format, because i guess the Internet has moved ahead and it wants to take you with it, but deep down you know that moving ahead equals more surveillance, tracking and consumer profiling... which is about as inspiring as the wait room in a vasectomy clinic.

you would think a guy like myself would be all over the vasectomy idea... being the confidence level i have in the idea that i do not want to have any more children... many other fathers in the neighbourhood have gone that route but i don't see me in that boat. I'm not a fan of the word "snip"... lets face it, it's a shitty word... four letters that have a zero positive factor. And of course the great lesson in life is to never give up all your cards in the game... not that there is really a game in the sense of a selfish person versus person angle, but rather you never really know what the future holds, and the minute you think you do you are wrong.

For example in the years ahead when fresh water becomes more and more scarce and Canada has to be invaded by foreign nations under security certificate ratification to make sure that the "earths" water for the "people" is in stable hands and not under the control of 13 term Prime Minister Harper, know for his aggressive attacks against the apathetic citizens of Canada. Being a port city, Vancouver could be one of the first places bombed and destroyed and then occupied... we might have to flee to the woods and live among the trees as rebel fighters... in a situation like this I could be called on as one of the natural leaders to donate sperm to help re-populate the rebel forces... clearly under these circumstances i would strongly regret any snipping that were to occur in my groin region.

Of course there are many other equally believable scenarios that all end in regret when the word vasectomy is used.

come to think of it... what a bad blog topic... I blame Mule... to take a page out of the Jefferson's

Damn Mule

what has mule got to do with it?

mule posted something on a network site, which got me thinking, which caused a distraction which then forced a simile and now we are visualizing testicular operations... damn Mule!

And he thought he had an eye problem!

I don't know what else to say... it could possibly be that this here blogaroo is "un-recoverable"... there is no saving it... the ships hull had been destroyed and the tiger sharks are just slowly cruising around knowing that the end is a foregone conclusion. Speaking of that last sentence... actually it's not even a proper sentence but the word "cruising" i had a hard time spelling... i was trying to throw "e" in there and then a "w". On thing i have been trying to challenge myself on is to try to spell the word right without going to the spell check that will give you the right answer... unless of course you try to spell colour or neighbourhood.

Went to the gym tonight to catch the third period of the Canucks game on the cardio machines... not since Wayne Gretzky high sticked Doug Gilmour have i seen such insane officiating.



Tonight there were some phantom calls when the game was on the line, and the calls changed the game... I would be more enraged if i had paid top dollar to see the game live... which of course would never happen (me paying top dollar to see a sports event totally geared for television). I believe i went in to that concept a few times so you can sift through the archives if you care.

I went to see Avatar on Saturday Night... I'm not a movie guy, but there was a "woman's" meeting in my house that night... where women talk about spirituality and goals and do tarot card readings, which is too much of a kook show for my man blood, so the options were drink and watch the Flames douse the Canucks or go to that other side of life and see a very popular 3D movie at a Cineplex Odion.

My friend had a "herbal remedy" that we sampled before going into the conglomerate complex of noise and lights... we had our tickets... my friend is very organized and he got them online in an effort to lessen the stress on our poor hearts. To make a long story mid-length we were there with our tickets a good 45 minutes before showtime.. we were actually outside listening to the end of the Flames Canucks game on our trusty portable radio thinking time was on our side... but we were wrong.

we went to our gate (gate 5) and they sent us to gate 10 on the other side of the building where there was a massive line up and people yelling at people... the crowd control people were shouting orders at the crowd... it was most degrading, and i was thinking that they are really wasting an opportunity here... they have all of us "consumers" here there should be screens on the wall or a designated waiting room hitting us with "cool" advertising rather than some middle aged troll barking at people not to sit against the wall but rather stand in an orderly fashion for the next 40 minutes waiting to hear some teenage jackass yelling have your tickets ready... as you can imagine we were rather traumatized by these events.. i just covered my ears when they started yelling as to shut out the bad energy. When the line finally started moving it looped into this strange hallway and back out

this was me in the hallway:



it was around this time i decided to ask anybody shouting for a pen... i had a bunch of ideas and the pen talk seemed to put them off their game and shut them up for a bit.

we got into the theater grabbed some decent seats and spent the next half hour being the suckers i wished we were when we were in line having fools yell at us. We sat comfortably and were the victims of some aggressive advertising. This is where i was thinking that a band would be a nice touch... i mean we are all here paying top dollar taking hit after hit... you could give us something... I'm sure i stand alone.. loud commercials me swearing for a mute button and then i remembered that i had to take a shit... now was my time to rid myself of that long skinny fecal matter that had been barking at my sphincter for some time... eventually that was over and i made it back for a few thousand previews and then our movie started.

the movie was pretty good... i liked the fact that it was low on the love scenes... the 3D was pretty good... i kind of wish i saw in in Imax but i imagine you would have to be in a line for hours with people yelling at you, which is worth nothing in this world.

but i guess the movie is about another world and it sure was that.

The other thing about the Movie was that one of the main characters, a woman scientist was chain smoking in sealed chambers where the humans had to live becuse the "gas" on the planet didn't jive with human breathing. She was smoking away and they really played up the "she is strongly addicted" card, which from what i have read is one of the primal bases of unconscious smoking addiction... ie: the smoking fetish.

good that our hero Mr. Cameron didn't pass up the opportunity to get in bed with the smoking industry in 2010. some things never change.