West coast love getaway

who makes love with a hat and some mittens
sexy and playful just like a small kitten
rain hits the window of the cabin by the ocean
what's in the tea more than a love potion
pot simmers the wood stove burns hotter
man is so happy he's finally got her
what begs the question is this love were after?
clumsy hands rumble and then bursts of laughter

It's not a question of love more like a sexual attraction
they need a reason to follow the feeling that is like a passion

there in the kitchen he makes her a dinner
lemon garlic chicken he knows is a winner
she wanders in and gets his attention
kisses her neck and back to the bedroom
Hurricane winds you can feel shake the building
cabin stabin' one time and there is no stopping
where were the words that came when it ended
it's all in an email and soon he will send it

Mule is Cal Ripken Jr.

21TR's
electronic press kit

Cal Ripken Jr. is a baseball great known for his "ironman" abilities. Mr. steady, a good old Mr. reliable. The kind of guy who comes up with a key double late in the game to save his team time and time again.

Mule, of course made it possible for the click link to occur... which marred the past few blogaroo's... if you know what i mean.

Difficult music

That would be Mule's writings... notice that great Supersimian review.

I was going to do a review of his review... but that could be considered factitious... or as we like to say "it would be an ill fated move".

Mule's copy and paste solution

21TR's electronic press kit

nope that ain't going to do it... this is one of those posts where we show our computer incompetence and our inability to grasp proper English.
Well the baby is crying so I guess we are all going downhill tonight.

Poor little girl, all snuffley and upset... I have a good mind to smash this computer for the good of all of us here in the Robertson home.

Tried writing a few songs last week... I should finish them... always a disaster bringing half songs to people. It's like "hey guys look what I have started and essentially taken nowhere".

But seriously I have things to do

SR

Today's Comedy

http://www.sonicbids.com/epk/epk.asp?epk_id=56223


The first one is that i can't even make that a fucking click link.

The grand comedy is essentially this:
Man learns to play music, writes songs and attempts to play them for people... but to do that he has to pay fees and spend countless fucking hours completing EPK's (electronic press kits)... Isn't that waht a fucking website is???
I mean holey fucking sheep shit! Am i some savage fucking jackass that needs to be constantly flogged on the rare moments i don't have to savagely work to stay alive in this shithole world.

Statement: IT IS NOT WORTH IT TO TRY TO PLAY MUSIC AT 'ACCEPTED VENUES' IN KNOWN FESTIVALS. YOU WILL SPEND WHAT LITTLE MONEY YOU HAVE, AND ALL YOUR TIME FUCKING WITH THINGS.

I hate being fleeced, and i know i got hosed today, and i wasted the day, and now I'm angry as hell and it's late and i have to work too early tomorrow

Complaints, Philosophy, Biology, sci-fi comedy, self-deprecation

Advertising...

That's why everything costs so much?
Just ban advertising and let the necessity of the product determine its survival.

Without advertising who would support my Blog?
How would the "Bone Robertson Logic" get out there?

These natural Biological models don't work for Humans. Possibly that would be a proper justification in differing the word "Human" from "Animals".

I wonder how spiders would fuck up if they were the worlds chosen species.

Would they all get caught up in each others webs on the way home from the "Flies abdomen grocery store".

Now there is a bad joke... I got to stay away from jokes cause I'm no bloody good.

Becoming slightly worried that the posts... I mean blogaroo's are becoming irritatingly incoherent

So i couldn't sleep

The I got up and checked my email. Only one thing from some company promising me the education upgrade that will change my life. It was based on life experience and my present state and there would be no test, exams, or wasteful study time.
I just call up the number pay the fee and viola a replica degree of some fine collage will appear in my mailbox and I can begin having the life I deserve.
The thing was so full of irony that I thought I should copy and paste it into the blog here and then spend the rest of the blogaroo tearing the shit out of it. But you know what the thing wouldn't copy and paste... it wasn't a word file... which would explain why the weird poem thing overlapped the bottom of it.
So I tried to drag and drop it in here but the computer would have none of that... then I dropped it on the desktop... it was shortly after that when my computer crash occurred... and then it wouldn't re-start... the old re-start while holding "c" down did the trick though.
It's times like this I thank my own smarts for getting a MAC.
You ever heard this one "OH man you can get it cheaper by building it yourself" and then you talk to that guy next week and you find out he spent the whole weekend rebuilding his hard drive, re-installing everything, and he does that 2x a month.
This good old G4 has never done me wrong, made videos, music, words, photo stuff, websites... never had to fuck with it.
Well I guess I should go try and sleep

Warning this post contains severe gibberish

Just spent too much time reading "threads" with respect to the Toronto Maple leafs Hockey team.
And you know what? I no longer see musician related threads as inane as I use to.

I was looking for some information on Owen Nolan... a Leaf player involved in a bitter injury dispute with the Club. I wasn't sure what was going on... possibly he would be back from an injury soon. It looks like it will be a snowy day in hell before he will dawn a Leafs Jersey again. Well I got my answer, and then I stumbled on a thread of "hockey experts" discussing the various acquisitions the Leafs made before the season started. And then you start thinking... are these people for real? clearly if you are spending your time as a "die-hard fan" wouldn't it be more enjoyable to know what the fuck you are talking about.

And then I recall the game I went to earlier in the year... the loud high end high blasting rock music over the delays that just went on. The crowd directing that happened after the extra long commercial breaks (you are sitting there for so long you forget that you are even at a hockey game and then the scoreboard has some lame animation and a big flashing MAKE SOME NOISE... and people start to cheer... and it flashes LOUDER... and they cheer louder... and it flashes LOUDER... and they cheer louder... and it flashes LOUDER... and they cheer louder... and so then everybody is cheering and they race over and drop the puck like it's an emergency. which would look good if you were in a bar and you just got back from a long piss and stopped to ogle some large breasted fine bodied woman and you got back to your chair and the last commercial ended and the stadium was suddenly filled with ravenous screaming fans and then a second later the puck drops.)

What was I talking about?

Probably has something to to with the fact that I am an intense Insane Maniac with a tendency to be a real stickler for the truth.

I remember reading a HST quote to the effect "there are no good people left to party with"... it's like the whole world has gone soft in the head and none of them have got any balls.
That is the essence of why people (myself included) love Don Cherry.
He doesn't compromise himself to do his job. He had a great quote a few weeks back while discussing who should be on the Men's Canadian Olympic Hockey team. The dilemma of course is that Canada has so many great players that some good players will have to be left off the team, which of course will cause the speculations to fly... probably plenty of good "threads" as well. Anyway Ron McLean said "anyway you look at it there are some hard decisions to be made" and Cherry shot back "They're not hard decisions, not if you call then right they're not hard".

write me a poem Georgina
put in it just what you want
now that it's said I got me in your head
the next step we call it #2

the middle of the night and rain in the headlights
we spoke so true
of dreams and a plan that should take long to span
we spoke so true

sing me a song Georgina
sing it with all that you feel
now that it's said I got you in my head
I want to get on with the rest of our time in true

yea sure I'll keep rocking till my ticker stops talking
cause that's just the way that I am
and now that it's declared there's a love that we share
I want to get on with the rest of my time with you

so take a walk with me Georgina
and see all that you can, the trees in the light and the planes in flight
make a good backdrop to me and you


well seeing that online should give me a little shock of horror in order to finish things up in the songwriting department.

another point

the usual situation is this: Robertson has it together... he has the guys and the tunes ready and then he goes into a patented Robertson mind freeze... (the Robertson mind freeze shares some characteristics with a severe stroke)... then he goes into a slow lethargic bad 3 chord song that he is not really currently inspired to sing properly.

If Adam was here he would say in a fairly cheery kind of salesman voice "they got this invention, you're going to love it... it's called a set list".

The woman would coo and the Mod squad would stamp their whiskey glasses on the table.

Is that last line a funny line? Probably not. Does it matter? Defiantly not.

play more music.

I practices for 2 hours tonight... I've been pretty ragged lately... too much nonsense and not enough music.


What the hell am I pecking at this shithole blog for????

SR

So many new things. What to think. Where to take this next little blogaroo.

Recall the fine bone Robertson Wisdom "People who put their noses in things that break noses end up with broken noses"

(sometime earlier in the history of me sitting at a computer trying to lash together some thoughts that may have a strange twist...so that more words = more search engine possibilities, which should mathematically increase the remote possibility that the internet thing might find my band and launch us into fortune.)

****i feel i should now touch on an irony contained in the above brackets, but i will pass******

So it was New Years eve and i was having a fairly aggressive conversation with my man Willingdon Black, we were talking about tigers , of course.
Now it was the type of conversation that required arm gesturing... there was this damn thing on the wall that kept getting in the way. It was like a close standing dullard... is dullard a word accepted by one of the larger cooperate dictionary book makers? We shall look into that one... but not now we must finish this.

Meanwhile I had just knocked this thing over and put it back on the wall not really noticing what it was... Bill Godwack was in the middle of a little standup routine "what do you get when you cross a Lama with a tiger... a Lager!" the women cooed and the Mod squad stamped their whiskey glasses on the table.

Next thing i know that thing gets knocked off the wall again... as i grab it i think golly gee what it this irritating piece of crap...so i look and see that it is a paper mashie head replica if this animal with a massive nose... and the nose has been broken many times... you can see by the weathering that it has been broken often and for a long time. It was on a wall in a narrow passage in a busy party place. In some ways given the use it has taken over the years it is doing well... except of course the fact that the nose is broken.
It is a thing who's existence is jutting it's nose out in a high traffic busy place... a place that would break a nose... and ladies an gentlemen. It has a broken nose.

And with that i would like to open my soothsaying business... for a measly $100 an hour you can now have me to give your ear a workout. Super Robertson one of the finest natural truth seeiers... Book your 10 appiontment deal NOW before the price goes through the roof.