Sunday, March 28, 2010

notes from chatroulette

what will they do... staring at the screen... one with his hand on his head... squintey eyes and a moustache and glasses... nothing typed a closet with one shirt and a crooked hanger. and on my end i correct myself but id does not matter because i am not heard for the things i type... who figures anything anymore... focus and a head scratch i wave goodbye

not bad thanks... what are you listening too... nothing Ha

China Brazil... wow that's a big male member... it always amazes me how forgetful people are when it comes to this type of thing... somebody could easily capture that and put it on youtube and then you could become as we say "the Jack of all asses".

Grey lines that run diagonally mean you don't want to play or perhaps you want to test the water before you jump in. Remember the signals when TV went off the air in the old days? Or how about that time Homer Simpson was Mr. Plow and he had his commercial and it came on just before the lines and the whole family stayed up too watch it.

camera come on... guy rubbing groin... he says hi... me giving the benefit of the doubt type hello... then i get you want to talk dirty... i reply not really

now we are back to people looking for a naked girl and finding me instead... i always relished the role of the spoiler

on another unrelated note i went to an open house today just for laughs (it was in the hood) always a good chance to get house ideas... and like everybody and his brother was there... the house had 2 bedrooms and other families from our street said to me "what are you doing here" to which i had to reply "same thing you are"

there were 3 offers on the table for everybody to see.. the plot thickens
I am not insane.

somebody was pulling the goalie in a balaclava... i typed good cover man... but they might have your ip address
ahh the old new post... a kid screaming, a tv on, some children watching the tV... and in the other window are various chatroulette "partners", most of them don't stick around long enough for a good dose of Robertson wisdom.

Many are looking for video sex... if that's what you call it... if phone sex is called that then i guess that would be it. I'm a natural nudist so i am not scarred by seeing these things... i think i might keep a magnifying glass by the table so that the next time i catch a guy pulling his goalie i can pull out the optic and put it to work. Most of these people i think are hoping for a naked girl and not the balding disgruntled fat body that happens to carry my soul... don't worry i'm just being hard on myself, remember life is a laugh... and then at nightime in the bed you give your goalie a workout off camera.

That's the way i roll. well now CT is now home... what happens if she walks in the room and at just that time some dude is yanking his member... would that look good?

perception can get in the way of reality some times...

Skypeing with random strangers... the lead line i have being going with these days is "S Robertson advice professional at your service".. i figured that could get the ball rolling in a direction i can deal with. Some are offended, some amused, and then there are other reactions.

well dinner time

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

it is possible that i lost my mind on that last post... fore sure the greatest goal scored in Vancouver all things considered... but hey... shit i forgot what i was going to write... this is happening all too often... it was more about technology with respect to shithole band websites and social networking, that all seems rather insane now that we got thinking about a grand victory. i think i was going to try and write some lyrics

i signed myself to twitter
and a widget that will fitter
right tight in the website for the updates and all

but everything that i say
is really not to gay
and now i can alienate...

i don't know

at least i had ice cream cake


Social media ain't too friendly when you have a fist full of fingers/ why do we do anything/... ahhh simple barley old sport. Never use "WE" when you mean "I" and your sanity is perhaps in question (wrongly of course)... it get's people a little "birdy" whatever the hell that means he says as he eyes another red line. The point being, or one of them anyway is that NEVER ASSUME MOTIVATION. Often times the motivation people have is rather different than the motivation that one may perceive from the actions that got motivated. Good folks want to stat punching people in the head over that kind of stuff. In a perfect world people who had points to make could make them and others could ponder those points and classify them accordingly, and then of course everybody else would just have to shut the fuck up... and don't even go outside where you might be tempted to think something out loud causing what we would have to classify as an "overhear error", which of course would activate a judiciary body to come and make a declaration of further insanity.

Blog regret
the greatest regret you lost all that time your a loser
Facebook regret
who gives a shit some assholes will just make a comment
Twidder regret
a little regret it comes and goes fast then it's gone again
Myspace regret
a common regret at least there is music a playing
google regret
a stinging regret of that time that you exposed your member

there's nothing you do but sit in your chair posting updates and checking the status
no rock and roll no hockey goal but the dishwasher cleans all your glasses

horn solo

Tuesday, March 02, 2010

OK I'll say it... the greatest Goal in Canadian history

Paul Henderson scored a huge goal in 1972 to stop Canada from going into a nervous breakdown over their Hockey superiority.

Wayne Gretzky and Mario Lemieux team up to win the Canada Cup in 1987.

But Sidney Crosby's goal made the Olympics. Yea we were on a roll but can you imagine if we lost that game?

I'm an Vancouver resident, taxpayer, homeowner, hockey enthusiast, Canadian patriot and parent among other things. I voted against the Olympics in that referendum back all those years ago... i remember waking up thinking "right on we are going to shut this thing down once and for all today"... i was wrong. My point was it's a bad idea to give corrupt politicians with deep ties to developers a free pass to make hordes of money... I'm not wrong about that. I'm glad we have bettered our transit system but I'm not sure about closing ice rinks for a few years canceling kids hockey seasons so that a good working rink can be "upgraded".

My wife an I also seriously considered buying into the Olympic village which was being billed as a sustainable community at one time... we even went to a few meetings... enough to realize that that was not the case.

I could rant about the Olympics but my point was more to set the tone that I was not a Ya Ya go Olympics kind of guy. But sports and my country are things I like and I suffered through the CTV coverage... remind me to go ape shit over that one in a later blogaroo... and got into the Olympics.

So come the final event of the Olympics and Canada is set to break the record for the most gold medals by any country ever, having just broken the record for most gold medals from a host country, and it's hockey... our game... you saw the adds.

If we lose that game on our own soil in the city hosting the games it's going to be an all time low. Can you imagine sitting through the closing ceremonies watching a group of lumberjacks tow an inflatable moose around a stadium waving at people after they just lost one of the greatest big games ever? I don't think so. People wouldn't have been cheering and acting gaily... remember what happened when the Canucks lost to the Rangers in game 7 in 1994 (the game in New York)... there was a fucking riot and some dude took a rubber bullet to the head (perhaps he had it coming... i don't know). What i do know is that me, an Olympic non believer, headed out of the house that last Sunday night to witness the vibe and take a few hundred high fives from the packed city streets... i saw police high fiving drunks... the police chief himself posing for pictures with smiling Canada jersey wearing happy people. I saw people shake hands with police thanking them saying "you guys did a great job" and the police smiled back and said "you guys did a good job too"... lots of garbage but very little damage... everybody was happy as can be.

Canada as a nation has lost Canada Cup's before...(now called the World Cup for some insane reason).

If we lost in 72 you could say well we came back from what look like sure defeat and made a game of it.

If we lost in 2010... well we didn't we don't even need to go there.